- + The Englishman —A British gentleman in the late 1800's was born to a poor family but through grit and determination begged, borrowed and stole his way to financial su...
- + Rope Game —Why did the ballplayer bring a rope to the game? He wanted to tie the score. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.n...
- + Three men are talking about their skydiving experiences... —Three men are talking about their skydiving experiences at a bar and how their parachute failed until the last possible moments. The first man start...
- + Debt Free —I am overjoyed! Soon I will be able to payoff all my loans and at last be debt free. I'm on my way to the bank, thrilled to know that in a very sh...
- + Translated joke... Hope I'm able to do it justice! —Translated joke... Hope I'm able to do it justice! A not-so-bright man is talking to his friend, and the friend asks him, "How many pancakes can you...
- + Guy dies and finds himself standing in front of Satan... —Guy dies and finds himself standing in front of Satan. He says, "Oh no, am I..." Satan says, "Yes, you are. But it's not as bad as you think. Let ...
- + My Hearing —After completing his annual physical on a patient, the doctor asked if there was anything that was bothering him. Joe replied, "Yeah, my hearing....
- + A woman is sitting at her recently deceased... —A woman is sitting at her recently deceased husband’s funeral. A man leans in to her and asks, “Do you mind if I say a word? “No, go right ahead”, t...
- + When We Were Kids —It was different when we were kids. In second grade, a teacher came in and gave us all a lecture about not smoking, and then they sent us over to arts...
- + A guy from the New York City was cruising... —A guy from the New York City was cruising at high speed down a Georgia back road he crested a hill and hit 2 hitchhiking hippies. One flew 50 feet o...
- + Painting and Cooking —John, an avant-garde painter got married. Someone asked the bride a few weeks after the wedding, "How's married life, Helen?" "It&#...
- + A Giant's Pronouns —What are a giant's pronouns? Fe/Fi/Fo/Fum. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net
- + A small family of three booked a flight to Kansas —They arrived at the airport several hours early. As he was only four years old and this was his first experience with this sort of thing, the son was ...
- + New Chemical Formula —TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water? SARAH: "HIJKLMNO"! TEACHER: What are you talking about? SARAH: Yesterday you said its H ...
- + Five Englishmen in an Audi Quattro rol... —Five Englishmen in an Audi Quattro roll up to an Irish border checkpoint. Paddy, the officer, halts them and sternly declares, "It's illegal to cram f...
- + Use this one yourself —3 top surgeons are sitting in a bar in _fill_in_your_city_ . One triumphantly says: “man, I still can’t believe it. Today a man came into the hospi...
- + Trust me, I'm Sleeping —My doctor told me that I have a condition known as narco-somnia, which has symptoms of both narcolepsy and insomnia. That's probably why I always...
- + Fractured Dictionary, Part II —Baloney \\ba-lo’-ne\\: Where some hemlines fall. Banquet \\bang’-kwit\\: Why the vocalist had no instrumentalists. Bernadette \\burn’-a-det\\: The act...
- + Blame It On the Media —Cockroaches are found to be capable in surviving a nuclear holocaust, yet one swat with a newspaper and it would die. Shows how toxic the media is. ...
- + Margin of Error —Here’s some advice... At a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give 110 percent! Unless the job is a statistician! #joke #short ...
- + Why is Dad's Hair White? —Kid: Why is some of your hair white dad? Dad: Every time you make me unhappy, one of my hairs turns white. Kid: Now I understand why grandpa’s hair is...
- + Chasing His Tail —As I watched my dog chasing his tail, I thought how easily dogs are amused... Then, I thought how easily amused I am watching my dog chase his tail. ...
- + Close Friends —I’m close friends with 25 letters of the alphabet... I don’t know 'y'. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheda...
- + We Need A Doctor —A girl was walking on the side walk. She sees a man lying on the street, needing immediate help. The victim says that he is having a heart attack. The...
- + Parrot Talk —An English professor complained to the pet shop proprietor, "The parrot I purchased uses improper language." "I'm surprised," ...
- + I've Got One of Them —A rookie was calling up his station on his pocket radio. “I’m outside the Plaza Mall,” he reported. “A man has been robbed. I’ve got one of them.” “Wh...
- + Spelling Lesson —Little Johnny wasn't very good at spelling. During an oral spelling exam, the teacher wrote the word "new" on the blackboard. "Now...
- + Ham Dinner —My wife and I were dining out at a nice restaurant. I overheard the couple at the next table discussing their bill. "Well Mary," said the ma...
- + Going To A Nude Beach—My friend bought a bus pass to a nude beach. It turned out to be a ticket to no wear. #joke #short Read more on page https:...
- + Going To A Nude Beach —My friend bought a bus pass to a nude beach. It turned out to be a ticket to no wear. #joke #short Read more on page https:...
- + Boy I'm Glad To See You —A hunter lost his bearings and wandered around the forest in a daze. Suddenly, he spotted another man. Dropping his rifle, he threw his arms around th...
- + I Want To Become A Politician—"Dad, I want to become a politician," said Jim. His father asked, "And what are you doing to become one?" "Nothing, dad." "Good, you're halfway the...
- + I Want To Become A Politician —"Dad, I want to become a politician," said Jim. His father asked, "And what are you doing to become one?" "Nothing, dad." "Good, you're halfway the...
- + He Doesn't Know the Meaning —A football coached was asked about his star lineman. The coach replied, "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I have seen ...
- + Banking in Switzerland —An American enters a Swiss bank with a giant, heavy sack in each of his hands. He goes to the teller, brings his face close to the glass and whispers,...
- + Like Father Like Son —Miser to son: "Son, how much did it cost when you took your girlfriend to dinner yesterday?" Son: "Dad, it was only $25.00." Dad: ...
- + Short jokes to start weekend with laughs—My fiancé and I wanted to get married at the public library. But they told us it was all booked up! I hate it when people get simple sayings wrong....
- + Short jokes to start weekend with laughs —My fiancé and I wanted to get married at the public library. But they told us it was all booked up! I hate it when people get simple sayings wrong....
- + Money Deposit—A customer goes to the bank to make a deposit. Teller: "Sorry sir. This $100 bill is a fake one. We cannot accept it." Customer: "What's the big deal?...
- + Short jokes for sunny Tuesday—Why is "dark" spelled with a "k" and not a "c"? Because you can't C in the dark!; A recent study has shown that women who carry extra weight, tend...
- + Money Deposit —A customer goes to the bank to make a deposit. Teller: "Sorry sir. This $100 bill is a fake one. We cannot accept it." Customer: "What's the big deal?...
- + Short jokes for sunny Tuesday —Why is "dark" spelled with a "k" and not a "c"? Because you can't C in the dark!; A recent study has shown that women who carry extra weight, tend...
- + Pregnant Wife—Wife: "I'm pregnant...." Dad: "Hi pregnant, I’m dad!" Wife: "No, no you’re not." #joke #short Read more on page https://jok...
- + Pregnant Wife —Wife: "I'm pregnant...." Dad: "Hi pregnant, I’m dad!" Wife: "No, no you’re not." #joke #short Read more on page https://jok...
- + Love My Wife—To show my wife how much I love her I bought her a beautiful diamond ring... I had it engraved with the cost. #joke #short Re...
- + Love My Wife —To show my wife how much I love her I bought her a beautiful diamond ring... I had it engraved with the cost. #joke #short Re...
- + An Atheist's Holiday —An atheist became incensed over Christmas holiday preparations. He filed a lawsuit about the constant celebrations given to Christians and Jews while ...
- + Reincarnation Seminar —Last night, I spent 5,000 bucks on a reincarnation seminar... I figured, "What the heck, you only live once!" #joke #short ...
- + Dating Vs. Marriage—Dating is like traveling on a bicycle. If you don’t like the journey, you can get off anytime. Marriage is like traveling by airplane. Once you’re in...
- + Dating Vs. Marriage —Dating is like traveling on a bicycle. If you don’t like the journey, you can get off anytime. Marriage is like traveling by airplane. Once you’re in...
- + Two Whales—Two whales walk into a bar. The first one says, "EOOOOOHAHHHHHMMMM-MMUUUUUUUUUOOOAAAAAAUUUU..." The second whale turns to the first and says, "Frank, ...
- + Two Whales —Two whales walk into a bar. The first one says, "EOOOOOHAHHHHHMMMM-MMUUUUUUUUUOOOAAAAAAUUUU..." The second whale turns to the first and says, "Frank, ...
- + Good News & Bad News—Doctor: "Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?" Patient: “Good new please!” Doctor: “Well, we’re naming a disease after you...” ...
- + 2024 April Fools’ Day pranks - get your pranks up to date—AI prank Ask something on about well-known person/celebrity a href="https://gemini.google.com" target="_blank">gemini.google.com or chat.openai....
- + April Fools’ Day Jokes - prank or get pranked—April Fools’ Day is the favorite holiday of which animal? The silly goose! April Fools’ Day is a great day to pull pranks. Except on me, if you’re s...
- + Good Candy—Boy 1: "How did you get that bruise on your arm?" Boy 2: "I ate some Easter candy." Boy 1: "Eating Easter candy won't give you a bruise." Boy 2: "It w...
- + Friday Funnies: 11 Jokes to Start Your Weekend Right—Did you know that the Icelandic alphabet does not contain the letter Z… How do they sleep at night? I was surprised to learn I weigh zero milligram...
- + The Accident That's About to Happen—Husband: Babe, after work I had an accident. Sabrina took me to the hospital. After various tests, they said I was in a bad state with cervical disloc...
- + I Need A Raise—I told my boss that three companies were after me and I need a raise. My boss asked, "What companies?" I replied, "Gas, water, and electricity." ...
- + Good and Bad News—The doctor took Dan into the room and said, "Dan, I have some good news and some bad news." Dan said, "Give me the good news." "They're going to name ...
- + The Forgotten Name—Two old friends met by chance on the street. After chatting for some time one said to the other, "I'm terribly sorry, but I've forgotten your name. Y...
- + 7 Short Jokes for Your Weekend Chuckle Fest—After my dad died, I went to his favorite park to scatter his remains. A park employee came running, yelling "STOP! You can't do that here!" I said ...
- + 28 Morbidly Amusing Dark Humor Jokes to Tickle Your Macabre Side—If you find these jokes funny, something is probably wrong with you! I was digging in the garden and happened to find a chest with a lot of gold coi...
- + Love Me After Marriage—A married couple were quarreling. Wife: You said you would love me more after marriage? Husband: I did, but I didn't think you would say yes. ...
- + Actuary vs. Mafia—What's the difference between an insurance company actuary and a mafia actuary? An insurance company actuary can tell you how many people will die th...
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